Thursday, February 17, 2011

NASCAR and Black Helicopters

We're expecting to see the traditional flyover at the start of the Daytona 500 to be those mysterious black helicopters everybody who loves those AM talk radio guys say are on the way. However, the source of the latest conspiracy has nothing to do with Barack Obama's birth certificate, 9/11 "truther," or even the Kennedy assassination. Leave it to Tony Korn-flakes to report he's heard from mysterious voices around the track that Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s winning the pole was a fix. NASCAR gave Earnhardt some benefit that wold make it happen. Okay, then who put pressed the detonation device that made him crash in practice.

Clearly, Tony Kornheiser has lost his marbles and might be a few fries short of a happy meal. How often have there been rumors of weird conspiracies in NASCAR?

Korn-flakes says his reliable source is Liz Clarke, a veteran race reporter for the Washington Post who  Tony the Kitty Cat said insisted there was a 60% chance Earnhardt's results were a fix. It hasn't been found in Wiki-Leaks has it?

Most of them seem to be from sports reporters from the North East who think NASCAR is not a real sport -- just a big gathering of southern white trash drinking lots of beer, eating funnel cakes and beef jerky watching cars go fast and turn right?  Maybe his source hangs out with Jeremy Mayfield who insists NASCAR must have put those drugs in his pee-pee. It wasn't him. Nope-nope-nope.

If Dale Earnhardt Jr. was running for NEMCO, we'd understand the skepticism, but he has a long record of success at Daytona, and who is his car owner and how many championships have come from that garage?

NASCAR is a real sport. It's here to stay. Surely race coverage is far more valuable to ESPN than PTI's cohost, Tony Korn-flakes.

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